||i have become comfortably numb.

[Roxie !]

All was silent in the blackened excuse for a forest that belonged to BloodClan. Bright green eyes flashed as they reflected the dim sunlight that managed to shine through the limbs of the deadened trees above. She took in her surroundings with wary mistrust. This was a cold place. She didn't want to stay here long. But the loner crept on, bravely, stoicly, for as much as she detested the riven place, one feline was placed solidly in her mind, and it was he who drove her here. In other words, love. Otherwise, you'd never catch Massie in BloodClan's territory. It was a dangerous thing to do, and if she was caught, she'd probably be killed. She wouldn't have come, in fact, Mikkikko had been spending most of his time with her anyway; but they both knew that he had to occasionally return home. Too bad this was a most inconvenient time.

Every bramble she brushed past, every twig her paws snapped, Massie would flinch in fear of being heard. This was too risky. God, she was an idiot for coming here. Her eyes narrowed at the thought, and yet she couldn't possibley wait for the ruddy tom to visit her again to tell him this particular news. Jaws parted slightly, scenting the air for any trace of her mate's familiar, warm scent. Where was he? She hardly knew Mikkikko's favorite haunts around here. And once she found him, how was she going to tell him?

Massie's eyes flickered shut for a brief moment. She hadn't even thought this out properly. How was she to tell Mikkikko...that she was pregnant? Neither of them knew how to handle this, she knew that much. What if he reacted badly? She knew he'd stay by her side no matter what, but she also knew that the idea of being a parent scared him as much as it scared her. Well, you're a coward for not telling him sooner. She hissed silently at herself, pausing angrily as something aprehended her steps. A large, sticky cobweb had caught on her paw, and she hissed impatiently and shook it off. Could this forest be any more depressing?

Massie carried on, too caught up in her thoughts to even bother with the slight tickling sensation that traveled slowly up her leg, and toward her shoulder. She moved on, trying to keep as quiet as possible, every muscle tensed, every sense alert for Mikkikko's presence. And so when a slight stinging sensation jabbed at her upper foreleg, she paused and frowned curiously. Had she brushed a thorn? She leaned over to inspect her calico fur as the slight pain grew disturbingly stronger. This was odd.

She blinked and lifted her head, looking around warily. Where was Mikkikko?

[le Dawnz]

OOC// Hey! You're title is Evanescence! I got their CD for Christmas. Also, did she just get bit by a spider? OMG is she gonna get super spidey powers?!??! O.o You did that cause YOU got bit by Spidah didn't you? By the way, this first sentence will probably sound familiar because I'm quoting it from one of the books because I REALLY need some inspiration to help me start out, kay?


Cold gripped the forest, fields and moorland like an icy claw. Breathing was made painful for the ruddy tomcat trotting through the dark trees. With every breath he took, bitter air sliced through his lungs like the sharp edge of ice would on a raw paw pad. Leaf-bare had left all five of the clans as cold and hungry as ever. Prey was becoming harder and harder to find, and cats were growing ill. Because BloodClan cats did not believe in StarClan, they were forced to either ignore or do away with sick cats. It was a crude and inhumane system, but it was what they had always done. Mikkikko didn't like it, but he felt loyalty creep into his burning chest at the thought of abandoning the clan he'd been born into.

Today the warrior prowled through the trees in search of something to eat. He hadn't seen his mate, Massie, in days, which was unusual even for this particular tom. They had had a rough start, meeting under the dire circumstances of Mikkikko's sister's near fatal accident. Now it almost seem pointless that Massie had been able to save her. Leafwhisper had died rather recently in an unexpected ambush from the dog residing in BloodClan's territory. The she-cat was no match for the dog in the first place, but her brother had recently found out that she had been pregnant. Had been. Which meant Leafwhisper couldn't have kitted very long before encountering the dog. Even Mikkikko knew that kitting took a lot of energy to do. He also knew that it could be fatal as well.

Though Leafwhisper's death was at least a moon and a half ago, it was still raw in Mikkikko's mind. Perhaps he might have moved on by now if it wasn't for more recent events constantly reminding him of her fate. He'd passed through a very rough period just a little while ago. He wasn't sure if something was running against him or if he was simply going mad, but whatever it was had nearly driven him off the edge of a cliff. Literally. Gladly, however, that tragic part of his life was over, at least for now. Right now, his main concern was the possibility of finding Leafwhisper's newborn kits. Though they would no longer be newborn, obviously. He didn't know if they were even alive, but he was determined to searched until he found an answer.

He heard scrabbling over the frozen earth and stopped in his tracks, dropping into a low crouch, he tried to pinpoint the location of his prey. Moments later he spotted a mouse through the lichen of a sapling. It sat on it's hind paws washing it's whiskers. Shifting his weight onto his haunches, Mikkikko made sure he was down wind of the creature before creeping slowly forward. Just as the mouse realized he had company, the tom leaped, tossing the small beast up into the air. He let it hit the ground, stunned, and killed it with one swift bite. Purring with satisfaction, he took the fresh kill up into his mouth and turned back toward BloodClan camp.

Before he could take another step, however, he felt the presence of another cat nearby. Sniffing the air, Mikkikko tried to locate the intruder. It didn't take the tom long to realize who it was. But what was Massie doing in BloodClan territory? Mikkikko knew just how much Massie disliked BloodClan, and she knew how dangerous it was to enter it's lands, especially after what had happened to Leafwhisper. Something in the warrior's head snapped and he quickly turned and bounded in the direction of Massie's scent, prey still hanging from his mouth.

He could tell he was drawing nearer, but he didn't smell any blood. He did, however, realize that Massie's scent was slightly different. The tom wasn't sure how, but it was. The smell reminded him of his days as a kit curled up at his mother's side. Everything had been different then. Nevertheless, Mikkikko continued, curiosity pushing him forward. He soon came to the narrow deadwood trail and trotted along it until he could see Massie's distinctive calico fur. Hurrying forward, he dropped his fresh kill infront of her and looked over her anxiously. He didn't see any open wounds, no blood, no limping. The tom let out the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding and purred. Stepping foward, he rubbed his cheek against her in greeting.

"Massie, what are you doing here?" he inquired with concern. "You know how dangerous it is in these parts. If a BloodClan patrol had found you..." The sentence drifted. If a patrol had found her, she could have been killed. BloodClan had been taking less and less prisoners lately. The thought of finding Massie's body lying cold and stiff in BloodClan territory was too much to bare. He'd already lost his sister, he didn't want to loose the love of his life, too. Mikkikko would do anything to make sure that didn't happen.


Edit: OOC// OMG write a novel why don't I? xD That really worked! Kewl.

[Roxie !]

OOC// -gives karma- xD, and yalp, it is! And Well, originally I was gonna have her get sick from this spider bite, but DUDE -gets slight inspiration from Lost episode- I just got the saddest idea for a final plot between these two! And I'll modify this post when I get back from school, and actually have muse to work with.

IC// None of this territory seemed familiar...and yet, it all looked the same. It was impossible to tell where she was going, especially with all the foreign scents around. But the still air meant it would be harder for a BloodClan patrol to find her. Even so, if she kept going at this rate, she'd soon be lost. Massie gave a sharp sigh of frustration and decided to stop before she got herself deeper into trouble. Mikkikko would surely be out to hunt or patrol sooner or later. She'd just...sit here and think things through. And so she did, curling her tail neatly around her paws and narrowing her eyes. But this...this could take awhile. Sometimes she wondered if her short temper made her irrational.

Lucky for Massie, though, she didn't have to wait for long. After a few moments of silence, a familiar scent drifted toward her, and immediately caught her attention. The calico loner jumped to her paws, wincing slightly from the newly found tension in her foreleg. Even so, she kneaded the thistley ground expectantly and let out a soft mew. It wasn't long before she heard the sound of quickly approaching pawsteps; Mikkikko had obviously scented her as well. And then, the ruddy tom padded into the clearing quickly, stopping before her and looking her over anxiously. Massie raised her tail in greeting, brightening slightly as she met his gaze. She could tell just by looking that her mate was worried about her being here, and she knew he had a right to be, but this was important.

As Mikkikko rubbed affectionately against her cheek, she gave a throaty purr and gave his ear a quick lick. This was a side of Massie that rarely showed, in fact, it only did when the BloodClan tom was around. His presence somehow calmed and completed her, unexplanabley. Massie closed her eyes briefly, taking in her mate's scent and wishing that the moment could last forever. But then, as always, reality jolted her back to earth, and she gave a brisk shake. Worry and uncertainty began to seep into her previously warm gaze. She had to tell him. She had to tell him now.
She'd lowered her tail now, her spirits lowered slightly, and the black tip of her tail twitched nervously. Massie lowered her green eyes away from Mikkikko's, and stayed silent for a moment that seemed like an eternity. "I know..." She murmured softly, "I know. It's just..." At any other time, Massie would have scoffed and assured him that she could take on any BloodClan warrior who tried to attack her, but now her mind was clouded and she was unusually quiet as she struggled to find words. Why her? She wasn't any good at this kind of thing. In fact, she was horrible at this kind of thing.

"I had to talk to you," She explained at last, her eyes raising to meet Mikkikko's again. The loner flexed her claws subconciously. Each time they sunk into the ground, they'd get a firm grim there, as if she expected to be swept away by some sudden wind, before she'd sheathe them again. At last, Massie was experiencing what it was like to be at a loss for words, ans she didn't like it at all. She felt so....helpless, and so unsure. Most of all, she felt afraid. A prickling sort of fear that started in her paws and crept up toward her heart.(It starts in my toes, makes me crinkle my nose!...sorreh)

Mikkikko and Massie had been through a lot together, to say the least. They hadn't met under the best of circumstances; tension looming in the air as Massie tried to save Leafwhisper's life. They hadn't exactly been friendly toward each other at that time, and no cat would have guessed that they would have ever become mates. After all, they came from two very different worlds. Massie had always hated BloodClan with a passion, and Mikkikko was one of their warriors, the actual son of Tigerstar himself. But love had a funny way of fixing all of that. And since then they'd been through so much, including Mikkikko's recent suicide attempt over Leafwhisper's death.

But this...it wasn't like any kind of physical danger they'd faced. Neither of them knew how to handle it. Massie took a deep breath, her heart thumping so loud that she swore Mikkikko could hear it. But she held his gaze firmly, although fear and uncertainty remained in the depths of her leaf-green eyes. "...I'm pregnant..." She confessed at last, the two words seeming to shatter the cold, calm quiet of the forest. She nearly winced at them, but at the same time a certain relief washed over her. There. It was out. Now she could only wait for Mikkikko's reaction.

OOC// Dude, when I wrote the first sentence of dialogue, I made a typo and it made Massie look like she had a lisp or something. I should sooooo make a character with a lisp! xDDDD

[le Dawnz]

OOC// Aww thanks! -gives Roxie karma- We're gonna start that whole "I can give you more karma than you can give me" thing again aren't we? xD And I thought that's what you might have done. O.o SPILL!! And okie doke.

[le Dawnz]

OOC// Ever notice how cats are always so surprised when they realized they're going to have kits?

Mikkikko relished the brief moment of peace that washed over him as his mate stepped forward to rasp her tongue over his ear. When she retreated, he realized that she looked as worried as he felt at that moment. What was wrong? What was so bad that the loner had come into BloodClan territory looking for him? The tom knew just how much she was risking by coming to find him, and he desperately didn't want something like last time to happen to the one cat left in his life.

The warrior listened as Massie spoke, dipping his head in a futile attempt to meet her averted gaze. She sounded so nervous it made Mikkikko wonder. Was this about Leafwhisper's kits? Was it possible that Massie had found them? But wouldn't that be good news? Wait. Did that mean that Leafwhisper's kits were dead? As these thoughts raced through his head, the BloodClanner narrowed his eyes, apprehension molding his expression.

This was a strange time for a flashback, but that's just what happened next. Mikkikko was suddenly remembering the day he'd met Massie under not-so-perfect circumstances. Leafwhisper had hurled herself over RiverClan's waterfall. Desperate to save her, Mikkikko and their father, Tigerclaw, had rushed to find someone who would help them. Asking the other clans was out of the questions, so the dark tabby had decided on Massie. Though the she-cat hated BloodClan, she couldn't let the apprentice die.

Reluctant but sincere, Mikkikko had returned to give his thanks. It was clear that something sparked between the two, because Massie made it painfully clear that he was welcome any time. Though it was extremely awkward for them both, he had returned for visit upon visit. At one point when the tom had been feeling particularly down, he remembered, he had come to visit Massie. He'd ended up having to stay in Massie's barn for the night because of a severe rain storm.

They'd been hunting when it began raining. As they headed back toward the barn, a challenge had lit between them. Racing up the hill toward Massie's home, they'd ended up slipping in the mud and landing at the bottom of the hill with Mikkikko's heavy form practically drowning Massie in the wet soil. It was a fond memory, for them both he was sure, because it was the first time they'd begun feeling slightly more comfortable around each other. They'd been through so much since that night.

Fond of, but irrelevant, Mikkikko turned the memory away and listened intently to Massie when she finally returned his concerned gaze and continued. "... I'm pregnant..." The words were said cautiously, quietly, and were accompanied by a painful wince from the she-cat. For a moment, Mikkikko thought he might have hallucinated. It didn't take long for him to realize he hadn't.

Pregnant? She was pregnant? She couldn't be pregnant! No! No, no, no... that couldn't be possible! If she was pregnant, that meant that... they were going to have kits. They were going to parents! Oh... my... No, this wasn't happening. She was... she was joking! She had to be joking! But one look at her face and he knew she was serious. At this point, it was easy to see that Mikkikko was beginning to panic. "You're... you're... but that means... we... we're..." He wasn't making any sense. He couldn't get anything out. He felt like someone had stuck a rock down his throat. Swallowing, he tried again.

"But if you're... if you're pregnant... that means... it means... I'm going to be a... a dad? We're... we're going to be parents?" Mikkikko still hadn't decided if that was a good thing, or a bad thing. Maybe it was a little bit of both? "I... I..." He realized he should try to find something positive to say, however hard it was becoming. "That's... great!" he meowed, trying to sound enthusiastic. Then, uncertainly, he added, "Right?" Then he realized something else.

"Massie! Massie, what are you doing here then? I mean... I mean I'm glad you came, and that you told me but... but it's dangerous! I mean... you're pregnant! You shouldn't be here!" He tried to push aside his mixed feelings about this and think clearly. "Let's... let's go back to your barn." He suggested. "No, wait! Are you hungry?" He dipped his head and looked around until he spotted the mouse he'd caught still lying at his paws. He picked it up, enjoying the scent that filled his mouth. Then, with the mouse still in his jaws, he said, "No, we should leave first."

He looked down at his paws again, then back up at Massie, meeting her gaze uncertainly. Then grasped the fact that he shouldn't have panicked. He shouldn't have panicked. The tom must sound crazy to Massie, babbling away. He probably made her feel bad, or worse, about the situation. "... I'm sorry." he said. "For... panicking, I mean..." He averted his gaze momentarily, but looked back up quickly, needing to know how Massie felt, and if she forgave him. Mikkikko knew she was a proud cat, and thought she might even be a little angry that he had suddenly become impulsively overprotective. His eyes searched her inquisitively.

[Roxie !]

OOC// xD I know! Pssh.

IC// The few moments in which Mikkikko remained silence were practically torture for the she-cat. She gazed at her mate uncertainly, completely unsure of what to expect. But judging from the expression that was overtaking the BloodClan tom's face now, it wouldn't be good. Massie's eyes widened slightly as she silently braced herself for Mikkikko's response. He seemed to be...well, panicking, which had been her initial reaction as well. It was probably best that she had allowed her thoughts to clear up a bit before coming here; otherwise they wouldn't get anything accomplished. But now the calico fought the urge to press herself comfortingly against her mate's flank. There'd be time for that later. Right now, they needed to discuss this seriously.

""But if you're... if you're pregnant... that means... it means... I'm going to be a... a dad? We're... we're going to be parents?"

Massie watched him stumble over words, her fur prickling uncomfortably. Yes. They were going to be parents. And saying it out loud only made it that much more real, so that she almost wanted to run off and forget everything. It wasn't that she was irresponsible. When she wanted to be, the loner could be completely devoted. But kits...kits were a different matter entirely. She didn't know how to take care of them. What if they looked up to her, expecting some sort of motherly wisdom? Then she'd become an utter failure. It wouldn't be fair to the kits, or to her. For heaven's sake, she didn't even like kits to begin with! She wasn't even remotely good with them. What if they hated her?!

Before her thoughts could progress, she shook herself out of them firmly. If this kept up, she'd start panicking as well. Massie's green eyes fluttered shut as she attempted to get a hold on the situation, but now...now Mikkikko was saying that it was great? Her eyes snapped open immediately, appearing unintentionally bewildered. That...hadn't been the reaction she had expected. But upon closer examination of the tom's expression, she realized that perhaps he wasn't being completely sincere. She guessed that he was probably just as frightened as her, but was attempting to be supportive. Unexpectedly moved by this, Massie tilted her head slightly, her eyes narrowing slightly. "Well," she mewed hesitantly. "I suppose--"

Before she could finish, however, Mikkikko was off again, this time on a full swing rant. He spoke quickly, so that Massie almost missed what he was saying as she struggled to register it all. The tom's voice was concerned and panicked, which was unusual for him, and completely unexpected for her. Massie merely watched with round, wide eyes, taking a step back instinctively and hesitantly deciding how to react. An orange ear flicked sideways in slight annoyance. She wasn't a kit, she knew the dangers of coming here, but she'd had to. Another reason why the loner wouldn't win mother-of-the-year award...she was far too hardheaded. But her protests went unheard, as she could barely get a word in edgewise.

When Mikkikko finally fell silent again, Massie surveyed him quietly. Annoyance still pricked at her at being fussed over. As a loner, she was somewhat independent and all. The she-cat gazed at her mate critically, but stayed silent. After all, it'd be hypocritical of her to tell him to calm down when her head was still spinning from all of this. She wasn't sure what to think, and her claws instinctively gripped at the ground as if she were dizzy. In a way, she was.

But then, her thoughts returned to moments ago, when Mikkikko had told her he thought it was great that she was pregnant. He had tried to mask his fear, for her, and the resulting rant afterward was probably just a different kind of release for those feelings. Massie met his eyes steadily, and in that moment, she finally seemed to calm a little. No matter how frenzied his words had been, they'd all been out of concern for her. She knew that her previous fears of Mikkikko freaking out at her about the kits were irrational. No matter how alarmed he might feel, he would stay by her side. Green gaze averted for a moment, suddenly becoming very interested in a nearby rock. "I'm fine," She mumbled softly, slightly abashed. "It's alright." The plain fact was, she just wasn't good at this mushy stuff, but when she finally returned her gaze to his, it sparkled with gratitude.

Massie looked around, suddenly becoming acutely aware of where they were, exactly. Mikkikko was right, this wasn't safe. And whatever needed to be discussed, it shouldn't be done there. She became silent and still for a moment, drawing a deep breath that spiked the silence that had fallen around them. The loner leaned forward slightly and touched her nose gently to Mikkikko's briefly before drawing away, still slightly shaken. "Yeah...I guess we should..." She trailed off, motioning with a flick of her tail back in the direction she'd just come from. She paused for a moment, before continuing.

"Will they miss you? If we go now?" Despite everything they'd been through, there were still some complications to consider. No one in BloodClan knew of their relationship except for Tigerstar, and he had taken the secret with him to the grave. She understood that it was fairly common for BloodClan cats to slip away for unexplained periods of time, but...if they were ever to catch Mikkikko with her...she shivered. She just wanted to make sure.

[le Dawnz]

A prickley sensation crawled up his spine. The tom knew very well that Massie was irritated by his concern, her glare said it all. But he couldn't help it. Perhaps if she hadn't told up what she'd just told him... no. That didn't sound right. If what she had just told him weren't true, then he would have kept his uncertainty to himself, and gentle suggest they leave. But... but now everything seemed different. All because of two little words.

"I'm pregnant." The loner's voice still rang in his head like an echo, bouncing from wall-to-wall as if it were looking for an escape. It haunted his brain, making his head spin. But Mikkikko pushed the feeling aside, reminding himself that he needed to stay as calm as possible, especially under Massie's wary stare.

Her gaze broke away from his for a few moments, seeming to look at something past him with great and sudden intrest. "I'm fine. It's alright." she replied gentley. There was no mistaking the slight discomfort quivering in her voice. Mikkikko silently wandered how much having kits was going to change her. How much it was going to change him. Was change a good thing? Or a bad one? All he knew at the moment was that change was confusing.

The she-cat looked back up at him, her thanks shining bright in her leaf-green eyes. Mikkikko couldn't help giving a little smile - though his mouth was full- , that sort of crooked one that had finally found it's way through the grimace that had haunted his face in the earlier days he'd known Massie. He watched her look around at her surroundings, and then step forward to press her muzzle to his nose affectionately. He purred softly to let her know he appreticiated the small gesture.

The cold breeze picked up behind the warrior, his striped pelt rippling. It brought the scent of rain on the horizen. Massie spoke again, flicking her mottled tail toward the BloodClan border. "Will they miss you? If we go know?" she asked warily. The tom shook his head. BloodClan may not know about his relationship with Massie, but finding out could be disasterous for them both.

Luckily, Mikkikko was well known mostly for disappearing at any given time for any amount of time, as was most of his family. Besides, no one cared enough about him. They would probably only notice his absense if he left and didn't come back. Though it was thought that BloodClan would hunt down their runaway warriors and kill or punish them, Mikkikko felt he had the right to wonder if they'd even bother.

Ever since his long time as an apprentice, the tom had always felt as if he were a disappointment to his parents and to his clan. Not for his skills, but for his lack of ambition. BloodClan was filled with bloodthirsty powerhungry villians, but Mikkikko was simply not one of them. "No. I don't think they'll notice." he replied, feeling all the self-doubt creep back into his paws. But he shoved it away, growling inwardly. He didn't need to worry about that. All he needed to worry about now as Massie... and their kits.

[Roxie !]

Their eyes locked, and Massie knew he understood her concern about BloodClan. but there didn't seem to be cause for concern--at least, not at the moment. Or if there was, Mikkikko was hiding it from her so that they could deal with the task at hand. She regarded her mate for a moment on this, before nodding quietly. It wasn't that the calico was ashamed of her relationship with the BloodClan tom; no, never. Massie believed that love, when it actually could be found, was nothing to be ashamed about, and she was never one to give a damn about what anyone else thought anyway. It was just that if BloodClan ever found out about them, Massie didn't think she could handle something happening to Mikkikko because of her. Her eyes narrowed. Wow...I'm not so good at this optimism thing, am I? She thought wryly, her whiskers twitching at the thought. Yet another mothering charactaristic she was lacking. She could see it now: her kit could catch its first mouse, and she'd impulsively say something like "Enjoy it while you can, come leaf bare and we'll all starve to death." Well...perhaps not quite that dramatic but...the point was, there were a lot of things to work on before she had these kits. And Massie had no idea how she would manage this. It wasn't as if she actually knew any pregnant cats. Pfft, where was a ThunderClanner when you needed one?

All Clan jibes aside, she had to take this very seriously. Mikkikko was right, she probably shouldn't have come here, and under other circumstances she wouldn't have. But now it was said and done, and it was best that they leave as soon as possible. Massie flicked her tail absent-mindedly behind her, until it suddenly snagged and snapped a bramble, causing a bird in a nearby tree to take flight. The sudden burst of noise in the stretching silence startled her slightly, and she glanced upward to track the creature's progress across the skies. It was a mere sihlouette now, black against the grey of the clouds. Grey clouds...those were rather sudden. Had she really been that unaware of the world around her not to notice the weather? And could she have picked a worse time to come here if a storm was on the rise? The prospect of a snowstorm was frightening, and just what they needed right now. If the snow came down thick and fast enough, even the most seasoned cat could easily get lost in its own territory, all of its senses handicapped by the sheet of cold whiteness pressing in on all sides. Massie nearly shivered at the mere thought. She had been through a snowstorm once before, and it wasn't a memory that she was fond of.

"Okay. We should go, before the storm starts." She meowed quietly, nudging her head upward slightly to motion at the sky. The calico glanced at her mate once more, wondering if Mikkikko hadn't noticed the clouds either--or perhaps only she had been lost in her own world. Either way, there wasn't time to waste. Turning back to the path she'd taken to come this way, Massie began to trot back toward her barn, throwing a questioning glance over her shoulder to make sure that the ginger tom was coming. At the moment, Massie was anything but relaxed, every muscle in her body stiff and tense, and her mind whirring with thoughts; but even so, the warmth of her barn was starting to look quite welcoming with the temperatures beginning to drop as evening slowly set upon the forest.

Kits...it was still something that seemed surreal. How many would she have? Would they look like Mikkikko, or her? Perhaps a mix of both? Who's personality would they take? She realized that these were all questions that a happy mother would be asking before giving birth. Despite her fear and misgivings, was it possible that the a part of the loner was almost excited? Maybe. She couldn't say. Only time would tell, she supposed. This was an annoying saying, and Massie had always regarded it as such because she was not exactly what you'd call a patient cat. Time was something she always seemed to be trying to outrun. But in this case, the stubborn she-cat had to admit that it was true. Gah... She thought, her ears twitching irritabley. Was motherhood changing her already? And what next, flying hedgehogs?! With her luck, she'd be seeing them soaring through the skies the next morning.

Massie wondered if she'd be anything like her mother. Kithood in her mother's barn...it wasn't bad, but it wasn't the life that a lot of clan kits were used to. Her mother was sharp and stern, and very blunt with her kits, unwilling to hide or sheild them from any of the world's cruel ways. She let Massie and her brother learn things for themselves; most of the time the hard way. An effective method, sure, but one that used to leave the calico increasingly frustrated. Still, her mother was loving and selfless and above all, patient with her kits, never judging them for who they were and providing unconditional support. It was something that Massie had always taken for granted until she had realized just how hard the job of mothering would be. She wondered if she'd ever be as efficient as her mother had been, a kind of role model to her kits and somehow perfectly flawed in their eyes. Massie didn't think she could do that. What if...what if her kits hated her?

And then, of course, there was her father. Well. Some father he'd been. If it weren't for the laws of nature, Massie could have assumed she'd never had a father at all! He'd left the family before Massie had even been born, and she'd never met him. Her mother had never spoke much of him, regarding the subject with could distain, but they'd gotten along fairly well without him. After all, Massie couldn't miss something she'd never had. But she'd always had a sort of anger burning away somewhere deep inside of her, hating her father for his actions, hating herself for never knowing him. But one thing was certain now: a source of reassurance. She could take one look at Mikkikko now, and know that the tom would never do the same thing to her. It was for this reason, and for many others, that Massie concidered herself lucky to to have him. And she knew that whatever the future would bring, she couldn't have been happier with any other cat in the world.

OOC//Um...cheesy. Okay anywho xD, we should probably close this thread like after you reply or something.

[le Dawnz]

The wind hissed as Mikkikko padded after Massie back toward her home. He was going to be a father! He had never even thought about that possibility. To be honest, he would have been less surprised to see hedgehogs fly! Would they like him? What if they didn't? Would they look like him, or Massie? There were so many things racing through his head. What kind of dad would he be? Maybe they would look like Leafwhisper, or... no. No. He couldn't think about those things right now. He would think about them later, right now, they needed to get home, safely. But he couldn't help but wonder how much would change with these kits...

Mikkikko picked up the pace until he was trotting quietly beside his mate. He couldn't keep the look of worry from his eyes, but he managed a weak smile as he pressed his flank to hers and gave her shoulder a soft nudge. He longed to rasped his tongue over her ear, but with a mouse in his mouth, it would probably prove to be a little too difficult. He could sense her own worries, and thought about how much this must have shaken her as well. Mikkikko knew Massie would have never thought over herself as someone's mother. In fact, she'd never been all that fond of kits at all, so he could only imagine what she must be feeling. He felt a wave of sympathy course through him. No matter how concerned about he might be about his own worries, the tom knew it would be twice as hard for his mate.



OOC//That sucked, but I really didn't know what to say next since I plan to have him freak out over the possibility of him being a horrible dad later.

[Roxie !]

OOC//Thazz okiee. We could start a new thread later or somethin'.